Nearly two years ago at Sean's funeral, a few people made some speeches that I will never forget. Most vivid in my memory are Ty's (both of them), and Ashley's. I remember laughing. I remember crying. I remember laughing AND crying at the same time. I remember sobbing uncontrollably. I also remember that I really felt the urge to get up to that podium and pour my soul out. But I didn't. I couldn't, I didn't have the strentgh to even stand at that point. It's been almost two years now, and it's been eating at me to finally get it out, so here goes.
I can't pinpoint the exact day I met Sean, but I know for certain that I first encountered him online, be it Subtutious or Electrocalgary. I remember his uncanny ability to use his wit and intelligence and creativity to easily counter my then clumsy attempts at what we now call internet trolling. I remember getting to know him much more closely at Society Thursdays at Manhattans. Cheap booze, free pizza, and good friends. Every week I was there, and I can recall the night when Cait and Sean sat me down and asked me to move in with them. I was a baby apprentice, still living at home. That house was my first family away from my family. Cait still laughingly remembers how she had to teach me how to use the laundry machines,
Sean was the big brother I never knew I wanted. His ability to mediate, educate, humor, and entertain really had an impact in how I viewed (and still view) the world. It still amazes me to this day at how four guys, complete individuals in their own right, managed to coexist in that house with next to no friction whatsoever. I moved in with my then girlfriend and out of 1519 in 2006 after spending two years there. My first home away from parents. My sink or swim in the real life. Sean definitely made the first steps to individual freedom and responsibility a lot more manageable and less traumatic. Sometime about a year later I had a bad night, and was driving aimlessly. I stopped by the house and Sean's light was still on. At one in the morning on a Tuesday, I knocked on the door. and Sean took me in, where we had the most in-depth conversation on every topic we could think of. I hugged Sean, I went home, and I slept easy. He just did that to you.
That was the last time I would see Sean in real life, my last interaction with him was an MSN conversation where we discussed our favorite new found beer, Wild rose Velvet fog. Sean was always incredibly supportive of my photography, and definitely pushed me to continue my pursuit of the hobby. And for that i am thankful. He encouraged me t follow my dreams, live life with a smile.
The only physical thing I took of his from the house after his passing, was one of his pairs of sunglasses. I keep them in their case, and whenever I go somewhere interesting, I bring them with me, so that he can (metaphorically) see what I'm doing. I have felt his presence on more than a few occasions, and I think of him almost daily still. I have a big road trip planned in the near future, and those sunglasses will be making the trip with me. Sean once told me; "Everyone is so busy trying to get from A to Z, that they forget there is 24 letters in between". I will be calling the journey;
"The B to Y adventure", with no set goal other than to stop at every letter in between.
Happy birthday Sean
I miss you
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